Field of Laughter

These four of mine, they trudge out to the middle of that hay field to satisfy a mother’s need for remembering moments. My sister looking through the viewfinder seeing us all laugh at posing just so, and smiling on cue.

She is Kaptured by Kelly and capture she does. Capturing moments this mother’s heart needs. Not just for the picture to be framed, but for the laughter of the day to sink deep into my soul, so that on days we are apart I can remember those special smiles we had out there in that field.

Small moments made big in my search for simple joy. Simple pure joy that fills a heart that overflows love. A kind of love that spills out when there are tough days. On days that we are separated by space or days when there is an empty house quiet and still.

On those days I will remember laughter in the field and remember God.

How much He has blessed our lives with these four. He placed them together in this world for a reason. He knows their hearts and knew they were a perfect fit to be siblings. I knew this long ago. Only did not realize how much they would rise to the occasion of being special.

On that day the youngest quit breathing they were there. There to see her lying on the ground with life fading. They were there to wait at the end of the lane to show the ambulance the way back to her. And they knew how much I needed them to be strongly calm, so that when I flew in the helicopter with her I knew they would be ok.

Hard days like that help us grow even more into the family God wants us to be. He carefully chose each of us to be together through hard, sad, happy, laughing days.

So, when the girls jumped onto the brother’s back, I smiled knowing that is exactly how God would have it. Siblings sharing the load of a world together with love, with God…four siblings growing in a field of laughter.

 

Copyright © 2011-2013 Hello Butter images & content

 

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Days Like This

Nearly 7 months later we show up to a large exercise room with therapists that have become like family.

That’s how it is in a world of special.

You can find a familiar love in unlikely places. Like doctors offices, hospitals and physical therapy exercise rooms. Where braces, walkers and total gyms are excitedly anticipated after a long break off, needed time away from physical work outs since seizures stole progress away. But, we brave the risk of over exertion, tired seizure attacks and happily meet up with familiar friends that also happen to be an important part of making her world a more mobile place.

It’s hard work for her when she returns. She moves muscles that are not willing to. She says “I can’t do it” to her therapy friends and they say “We won’t hear the cant word”. She says, “it’s hard” and again the response is encouraging,

“I will ask you to do hard things, but you have to work hard to grow”.

She smiles big and puts her head down to focus on those weak muscles and with determination there is ever so slight movement in tired places. She smiles even bigger knowing she can even through the hard.

We all need days like this, hard but necessary. Working through hard to grow more.Grow more into less of who we think we are and grow more into who God knows we are. It takes hard days like these to see weakness in muscle slowly progress to the places of strength that only God knows exist. We need to journey through hard days to discover a strength that results in living full,simple peace.

God grows hearts through hard days…

Hello God…Hello Butter

Whisper a Prayer

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
every one was stirring when suddenly she became quiet as a mouse.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
when she started to have a seizure and it’s just not fair.

As we fought the urge to arise with a clatter,
we did not rush to the ER because we knew what was the matter.

After awhile she started to awake and her wondering eyes did appear,
She twinkled that bright smile, that is ever so dear.

We took a deep breath and remembered to say,
Thank you God for Jesus and his birthday.

We retire to bed with no signs of seizure in sight,
we are happy to say Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight.

And if you dont mind please whisper a prayer to keep Claire seizure free,
So she can experience all that Christmas is meant to be.

Always reminded of how blessed that we are,
Our family of love the very best gift by far.

Small is Big

 What will I remember?

When my eyes have become tired and mind fading? What will I remember about these days of living full? Of life that passes so quick, of school routines,volleyball matches and football games played? When the nest is empty and the house is quiet and still?

What will I remember?

 I really won’t remember the avalanche of homework and paperwork sprawled throughout the house, or late night suppers thrown together, dirty dishes and clothes piled high. Mini vans full of left over food,gear and Gatorade bottles empty.

  Instead, I will remember the firsts of all the moments a kindergartener has. Her first day of school, her first teachers,the making of her first friends and her first smiles of a happy heart filled with dreams and  learning.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Instead, I will remember the smiling first days of a junior high daughter,exciting and full of all things new. The changing of class,the learning of new games and new routines.

  I really won’t remember those news stories in the morning paper,that would make me wonder about one reporters views of hard-fought games.  Hard fought games under the Friday night lights that seems so big, but really in this full life how big is it?

Instead, I will remember my mom heart full of nerves but always calmed by the knowledge that God is on the football field too.

It is the small moments of the game that are the biggest. It is the small moments of this game I will remember. I will remember the small moments of Fridays with bananas and yellow tape and scrubbing white cleats clean,taking priority. The hugging of a player excited to go to the lights, the quick word of encouragement always with a “play like its your last” theme.

I really won’t remember the score, or the yards gained, or passes thrown or even the news headlines.

Instead, I will remember the heart, the character, and the witnessing of God making boys to men. God blessing the game with boys all heart, that grow up playing hard and running fast to a life that is full.

A life full of small moments made big.

Small moments of team helping each other up when they are down, moments of blood, sweat and tears. Small moments of wrapping my arms around a young man learning to win in more ways than a scoreboard will ever show.

I will remember the game,the player,the kindergartener, the 7th grader…all being full of small moments big and just how big God is, especially in the small. Especially in the living full.

I will remember to say Hello God…Hello Butter

© 2012 hellobutter

 

 

 

Living Thanksgiving

 

 

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is a time for reflecting on being grateful. Every year I list all I am thankful for praising God for His blessings in my life. Its a long list and a heartfelt prayer of thanksgiving.

I wonder…Is it enough? Is it enough to just say thank you and praise God? On the rainy days life is sure to bring, will  just saying the words of gratitude, be enough to find the sun despite  the falling rain?

This Thanksgiving I will continue with my list of blessings and praise God for all the gifts in my life. However, I will not be satisfied by this act alone. I am working on keeping the attitude of gratitude alive in my heart everyday.

I have hard days when the rain wins and the sun disappears.

I am convinced if my heart is full of grace, not by mere words, but attitude and actions of gratitude I will not only find sun in the midst of rainy days, I will feel Grace from the Son. Then His love will be enough.

Ann Voskamp is an author I had the pleasure of hearing speak last summer. She writes: ” Because Thanksgiving is more than a holiday-its the way to wake up to really,fully living” This idea to live fully and give thanks for all things is what I want to be planted deep into my heart. 
 
Living Thanksgiving in every moment.

I am celebrating His Grace this Thanksgiving by action and attitude so then I can say, goodbye to hard rainy days &…Hello Butter

Read more about Claire’s current health @ http://http://www.carepages.com/carepages/babyclairespage/updates

Butter Birthday Bliss

Our first birthday party on the ketogenic diet was a success. I think it was even better than previous parties because I was not focused on food preparation. Instead, we had a tea party for Claire. It was perfect since the food consisted of mini versions of quiche, cheesecake,  & eclairs all from the GFS store. Easy, take out of the box & make pretty on a plate.

 
Claire was happy with her chocolate cupcake made from a recipe on the myketocal website and figured portions on the ketocalculator. I don’t think it was the best cake she has ever had, but I think for my first try it wasn’t too bad. I used finely shredded coconut instead if coconut flour, I think it was a little too  gritty.

Birthday cake on the ketogenic diet

She is allowed herbal tea, but we haven’t found a flavor she likes. I’ve even tried apple tea to replace the apple juice she loved so much. She has been happy with drinking water and just one diet caffeine free pop a day.

We are still missing ice cream and she does not like the frozen cream with fruit that she is allowed. So we have replaced ice cream with plain shaved ice. I do use sugar-free syrup occasionally to make it more of a flavored treat. But we try to limit artificial sweeteners, especially if she has had her diet pop.

Our family loves a good spread at a good party, but we really didn’t miss the food. We just enjoyed the being together to celebrate another year of God’s blessings in the life of our amazing miracle girl.

 
We keep asking Claire ” how old are you” and she grins her big sparkling smile and says “I’m four…where did three and a half go?”  so today we say…

 
Goodbye three and a half…Hello Butter