God,Butter & the Moon

January 11, 2012

Adding my story to the Ann Voskamp series~The Practice of New Habits

I have always been an admirer of the night sky. I think it goes along with the dreamer in me. Last night as I wondered at the majestic beauty of the full moon, I was reminded of how just a short time ago, I feared that same moon.

It’s a fact (in my head) of the disturbances a lunar glow can bring to life. Every time there was a busy night in the nursery, I blamed the moon. Every time there was a crazy night full of weird happenings during a nightshift at the hospital, I would blame the moon. Even when my children start to have an abundance of suspicious energy, I find myself saying “is there a full moon?”

As much as I enjoy the night sky, there became a growing dread each month as the full moon approached. The reason for this dread was due to the fact that Claire’s worst seizures happened during the brightest lunar phase. More proof the diet is helping Claire to stay seizure free is my viewing the biggest brightest moon last night and rocking my girl to sleep in the comforts of our living room, far from the emergencies Claire’s seizures would bring.

It was during a full moon the last time I was strapped into a helicopter seat. Claire was fighting for her life behind me and fear was seeping into my entire being. As this fear rose, so did the helicopter. Rising into the icy cold winter night I felt a chill like no other. I thought this flying trip to another children’s hospital combined with the eerie cold dark, could not be a good sign.

My usual optimistic self was battling the dark in those few minutes of departing from the helicopter landing pad. That same landing pad painted with a giant white cross had brought comfort in the past. Seeing that cross knowing it was a landing zone to safety, to people who could save Claire from the life stealing seizure she had just suffered. But on that night, we were leaving that cross and my fears were mounting.

Our past emergency flights had been in the bright of day. This was the first time I experienced lifting off under the cover of darkness. The dark seemed to be taking over, until I cried the most comforting prayer I know. I closed my eyes with the uttering of this one name: Jesus. I felt the lurch of the aircraft in my stomach as we jolted up into the dark. Tears started to fall down my cheek and my heart pounded into a fearful fit.

The previous trips had ended with me seeing that cross on the landing pad as a sign from God. However, in the darkness of this night, He felt so far away. I thought, “Dear God, where are you in all this darkness?” Just when I thought where in the world could I find light in this moment, I opened my eyes to the night sky we were ascending into…nvgand there was the fullest of full, lighting the darkest of night.

 The lurch in my stomach from take off was nothing compared to the leap my heart experienced when I saw that beautiful moon. Knowing God created that beauty in the night, lighting my life in those fearful moments, was my sign. God was there, He is always there. Even on a cold dark December night. I only needed to look up.

I usually end my post with saying goodbye to something. Today, I don’t want to say goodbye, only Hello. Hello to God today and everyday. Hello to all the riches only He can give. Riches of a life blessed by saying Hello God and finding Him in the light of the moon on one scary night.

 A diet full of butter is thought to be of rich flavor , but a diet of saying Hello to God will provide more riches than one can imagine.

So, in every moment of life I choose to practice a new habit and say:

Hello God…Hello Butter

Living Thanksgiving

November 23, 2011

 
 

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is a time for reflecting on being grateful. Every year I list all I am thankful for praising God for His blessings in my life. Its a long list and a heartfelt prayer of thanksgiving.

I wonder…Is it enough? Is it enough to just say thank you and praise God? On the rainy days life is sure to bring, will  just saying the words of gratitude, be enough to find the sun despite  the falling rain?

This Thanksgiving I will continue with my list of blessings and praise God for all the gifts in my life. However, I will not be satisfied by this act alone. I am working on keeping the attitude of gratitude alive in my heart everyday.

I have hard days when the rain wins and the sun disappears.

I am convinced if my heart is full of grace, not by mere words, but attitude and actions of gratitude I will not only find sun in the midst of rainy days, I will feel Grace from the Son. Then His love will be enough.

Ann Voskamp is an author I had the pleasure of hearing speak last summer. She writes: ” Because Thanksgiving is more than a holiday-its the way to wake up to really,fully living” This idea to live fully and give thanks for all things is what I want to be planted deep into my heart. 
holy experience 
Living Thanksgiving in every moment.

I am celebrating His Grace this Thanksgiving by action and attitude so then I can say, goodbye to hard rainy days &…Hello Butter

Read more about Claire’s current health @ http://http://www.carepages.com/carepages/babyclairespage/updates

Our life is truly surrounded by butter these days. But having this diet change in my life makes me think of butter differently. I think of my life being made richer by the changes a high fat diet has brought. I look at a stick of butter and can’t help but think, ” I am rich” and I begin to count the ways I am rich.

One of the ways I am made rich is by being richly blessed by the abundance of love in this life. Knowing it is a stepping stone to eternity, the love found here and now is but a small foretaste of what our awesome Creator allows us to experience before we can all be called into His kingdom to love in ways beyond our mind can fathom.
God has blessed me beyond abundance with love that surrounds my heart and grows my soul.
Family love is one that makes my heart strong, but another love is just as great is that of a friend. While I have many to speak of today, I am talking of a southern beauty that walks and talks a love beyond what the eyes see straight to a heart that feels. She walks the Proverbs 31 woman’s life.

Wendy & Claire love

Wendy is love, Wendy helps my soul grow by just being in her presence and the strength of her heart pulls at mine. She is made strong by faith that she grows with living as a daughter of the Almighty King. The result of her faith is His love that shines as  she walks through this life.

my eyes are so puffy tired, they look closed

I am honored God introduced this amazing friend into my life. We were reminded this weekend at the She Speaks conference of seeing life’s gifts, thank you Ann Voskamp for the gift of your mesmerizing voice and beautiful heart.

http://onethousandgifts.com/

On my One Thousand Gifts list…my sweet friend,sister in Christ,Wendy Pope

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